Should You Go Through Your Partner’s iPhone?

In a romantic relationship, the boundaries around phone access vary from couple to couple. A woman on TikTok, however, recently shared a story that makes a strong case for full transparency.

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In a video with over 3.7 million views, Cat (@catstoriesss), who often retells Reddit tales as if they’re her own, recounted a dramatic cheating saga that captivated her audience. 

The story starts with Cat addressing those who avoid going through their partner’s phone. “For all the girls that pride themselves like I did on not going through their boyfriend’s phones—this is for you,” she begins.

‘I’ll text you in five’

Cat recounts the tale of a woman who discovered her boyfriend of eight years was cheating on her—all thanks to a bizarre series of text exchanges.

The boyfriend, after buying a new phone and losing his contacts, asked his girlfriend to text him so he could save her number.

She then sent him a playful message: “Hey, [expletive]. What’s up?”

The response was unexpected. “He texts, ‘Hey, can’t talk right now. I’ll text you in five,’” Cat narrates, adding that the girlfriend initially thought he was joking.

However, when he ran to the bathroom after they got home, things took a turn. A text popped up on her phone from him: “Super [expletive]. Want to meet up tonight?”

Confused, the woman replied with humor, writing, “Why later? Why not right now? but the boyfriend’s response—“Ok, will try to make it ASAP”—raised suspicions. 

When he exited the bathroom, he made a shocking announcement.

“Hey, so I’m not feeling too good. I think I’m gonna head home,” he told his girlfriend, followed by, “Oh, and by the way, can you actually text me so I can save your phone number?”

At that moment, the girlfriend confronted him: “Who are you texting in the bathroom?”

And that’s when the truth came out. “He came clean about everything,” Cat recounts. “He told me he’s been with someone else for two years.”

“Go through your boyfriend’s phones,” she concludes. “This would have saved me years of my life.”

What do experts say about checking your partner’s phone?

As reported by TreatMyOCD, regularly checking a romantic partner’s phone may not be a healthy habit and could even become obsessive.

The site, consulting a licensed therapist, emphasizes the importance of trust and respecting each other’s privacy in a relationship. 

“The only way to eliminate all risk of being cheated on is to not be in a relationship,” the therapist explained. “So I urge you to accept the natural uncertainty and take a leap of faith into your relationship with your partner.”

For those who suspect infidelity, the site advises prioritizing open communication. If the issue persists and trust cannot be rebuilt, ending the relationship may be a necessary step.

@catstoriesss HE WASTED 8 YEARS OF MY LIFE #redditstorytime #grwmstorytime #redditstories #fyp #ex ♬ original sound – Cat

Viewers share their thoughts 

Though the story is apparently taken from Reddit, viewers were still highly invested. 

“I promise you if a man is completely loyal to you, he doesn’t care if you go through his phone,” suggested one user.

“Him not knowing your # after 8 years is crazy,” offered another.

“8 years. No ring,” remarked a third. “I’ll never understand that.”

The Daily Dot has reached out to Cat (@catstoriesss) via email and Instagram DM for more information.

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